SOCIAL MEDIA

Thursday, January 15, 2015

What I've Learned about Pregnancy Thus Far

Which is about 15 weeks and totally makes me an expert now, right?
Ha!

I have learned that IKEA is a twisted lady who will steal your heart and then smash it down onto the street only to have city bus run it over. And that's putting it mildly; sans profanity.

We found a crib. We agreed on the crib: the size, the color, the everything...add to cart (since there's no IKEA near here!) and boom; item is NOT currently in stock. Taylor, the genius, level-headed one of our duo - almost trio suggests looking at the Atlanta store since his sister is out there.
Great idea! We could send her the money and she could purchase the crib in person, done and done.

Nope, out of stock in store - we don't know when your item will be in stock again.
I would have cried, but honestly, what would I have accomplished? A wet keyboard and a confused husband and pup.

So, IKEA, even though we've never properly been introduced, I'm afraid we have to break up.
Sorry. Unless the Hensvik crib magically comes back in stock, then we can be buddies again.


After perusing Babies-R-Us and Pottery Barn and Wal-Mart and Target, I've learned one thing. All cribs look the same. And yet, I cannot decide on which one to get since IKEA broke my heart.
We want something that can be placed at different heights and is also convertible, when the time comes; which describes 99% of cribs. I'm being a bit more picky, (it's our first, we can be naive and picky) I want something white, which looks classic and clean, and I don't want anything bulky.
Am I asking too much? IKEA thinks so :(

-I've also learned that being this far along (15 weeks), I still fall into the "is she fat or pregnant?" category; which works wonders on the self-esteem.

-Some clothes fit, some don't. But buying maternity clothes sucks...Target's selection is minimal at best and even though the lady at Old Navy PROMISED me that their new shipments arrive on Tuesday and Thursday, each Tuesday and Thursday I've visited, no new sizes are out. Folks, not everyone is a size 4 or 6, some of us are 8 or 10! I even asked if they had more items and was directed to the plus size section. Being pregnant doesn't equal plus sized.

-I've learned that you can never be too close to a restroom. No joke. I can't even stay for an hour meeting without having to visit the facilities. Oh, and I get up 6-7 times a night. A night! At least my body is getting prepared to live on no sleep in the coming months.

-Pain. Pain is constant. Obviously not labor pain, but it's something that I call upper butt pain. It's a pain that's deep within your lower back/upper butt and nothing can be done to help it. The technical term is sciatic pain, I prefer upper butt pain. And to date, it's only on the right side...let's pray it doesn't jump ship and decide to spread the joy to both sides!

-And folks, that thing about energy coming back, it does! Not a lot, but now I don't feel the need to sleep for 23 out of 24 hours. I can finally finish editing that last wedding - sorry y'all!!!

-Diaper bags are made for women. Done. They are too girly and have too much chevron and I would never make my husband carry around a girly bag; other than when I make him hold my purse while shopping, which is almost never. We discussed a backpack option, he said he's done with backpacks, he never wants to see or use one again! So we decided on an Indiana Jones leather satchel as a diaper bag; if that even exists.

-Brushing the tongue is still touch and go. Some days I don't gag, some days I do.  

-I have a love/hate relationship with orange juice. I CRAVE it so bad in the mornings, but by 8:00am I am overcome with heartburn. Will I stop drinking OJ? Probably not.

-Being this far along and KNOWING that we could find out the sex, but are opting not to is hard. It's hard to plan. It's hard to bond. It's hard to buy things. I don't want anything too feminine and definitely don't want anything too masculine. And all stores are divided into boy or girl. When online shopping and you click 'gender neutral' they give you neutral all right. Gray and brown. That's it. Frustrated!

-Another perk is my awesome hair. It's grown so much and is healthy and vibrant and beautiful. I know that will change post-partum, but for now, I am embracing that I look like Merida from Brave.

-Itching. Constant itching. Legs, stomach, boobs - they all itch. ALL THE TIME.

-My sweet Norman has become a stalker. He's always been attached to me, but since the pregnancy, he's always by my side. If I get up and walk to another room, he saunters in, just checking on me. He's always directly next to me; if not touching me.

-Restoration Hardware has a baby section. Don't waste your time. It's too gorgeous and expensive and will only make you upset. Take my word for it. Or you may somehow twist and justify that you need a $1,200 crib with $600 sheets. I couldn't make that justification; though I tried. I cannot fathom buying a crib that costs more than my monthly rent only to have a tiny human poop and vomit in it.
And that's how I justified NOT buying it.

And to end this post, here's a photo of the first item we purchased for Tater Baby's nursery:

 An extra large tapestry of the United States that will hang over the crib. 

I've got a lot going in my mind for the nursery, but seeing as we may/may not be moving, it'll be hard to nest...Either way, I will most definitely be doing a nursery inspiration post soon! 


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